UPN.com- In a debriefing shortly after leaving Judge Judy's courtroom on Monday, Randy Shandis was unable to hide his disappointment at the court's ruling in favor of his opponent in the Internet Mayoral election.
"I don't even think Judge Judy listened to what I was saying. I paid for those shrubs, there's no way they can be his. I'm very disappointed and I may appeal my case to the FCC."
During an intense eight minutes of interrogation by Judge Judy Sheindlin, Mr. Shandis and Al "The Foz" Fozano were forced to relive their days as bickering next-door neighbors. Mr. Shandis claims to have bought several "office park grade" shrubs that he placed between the now-feuding candidates' homes in order to maintain some privacy.
"I like to sunbathe nude," explained Shandis, "and I'm not ashamed of that. What I am ashamed of is my ex-neighbor who couldn't get enough of looking at my doodle. That's why I put in the shrubs."
As has happened many times during this campaign, however, Fozano tells a different story. "He did buy the shrubs, that I won't dispute. But Judge Judy agreed with me that he planted them on my property. And without permission. The gall! I was not obsessed wth his wiener, as he claimed. How does the saying go? You see one spaghetti noodle, you've seen tham all."
Fozano, claiming landowner rights, had the shrubs removed. In this case before Judge Judy, Shandis was suing for $5,000. $232 was for the cost of shrubs, $1400 was for skin-rash medication which Mr. Shandis claimed was a result of increased stress over this issue. The remainder was split between pain and suffering and lost time to file this case, getting a manicure, a receipt for $147.72 fr a new suit at JC Penney. and having his head waxed. He received nothing.
Fozano countersued for $5,000 for what he called "that little weasels slandering ways." Ms. Sheindlin dismissed the countersuit on the grounds that there is no statute on the books for "weasel slander."
"Fozano: "Of course, I'm pleased that Shandis has been exposed as a fraud. But I thought my countersuit would win a sympathetic ear. I thought I made it very clear that Shandis is an unlikable liar and thief, and deserves what's coming to him."
Shandis said he was "heartbroken" by the Judge's ruling, but will not let it slow his campaign. "No, no, no, this won't hurt my chances in November. In fact, first thing I'm going to do when elected is set up an online courthouse. And I will sue Fozano again, for 100 million bucks.
"And he'll lose."
