Candidate Randy Shandis
While the Internet Election committee ponders who will run the Internet in light of the 48% "None of the Above" vote in the recent election, Randy Shandis has vowed that he is "not a loser" and will fight the results, "outside the system, in the most illegal way imaginable." Currently, the Election Committee is waiting for the case to be heard by the Florida Supreme Court, which claims it has more important frivolous lawsuits to resolve first. Read More...

Candidate Al "The Foz" Fozano
...said a somewhat frustrated Al "the Foz" Fozano this week. "I CAN"T TAKE THE FU#$%^ PRESSURE ANYMORE!!!" the Foz was promptly injected with 20 ccs of a mild "relaxer" by a busty blonde nurse while onlookers watched in hushed reverence. Read More...

Because neither of the candidates won the majority in the recent Internet mayoral election, the Committee cannot deem an individual the winner. Read Previous Election Stories. See Final Voting Results.

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